Groan for Fullness


Over the last few months Holy Spirit has been increasing a groan in our hearts on numerous levels. The way He has been doing that is by asking us questions. These questions are not for us to necessarily try to answer (as if we can offer Him any knowledge) but these questions are more for us to meditate upon and to join in bearing Christ’s burden; to feel the pain of longing that is in His heart. Here are some of the questions we feel like He has been asking us.......
What is the appropriate response of love to Christ and Him crucified? - how should I respond in light of deserving eternal punishment in a lake of fire, but the God of all glory loved me so intensely that He put on a human frame forever just to have in thrashed and torn asunder by wicked men who nailed Him to a cross so that the wrath of God I deserve could be satisfied!? What kind of love is
this that Christ displays to go from the very heights of glory to the depths of Sheol to ransom me from my wickedness? How should I respond to this? How should love be reciprocated back to Him? Do I really believe that I am fully deserving of eternal punishment? Do I realize how wicked I was? Do I realize how holy He is? Do I understand the vast chasm that lie between sinner the the Holy God? Do I grasp even a little of the majesty of God and the severity of sin? Do I see Jesus’ arms spread out bleeding, dying, enduring my hell for me as the only way to reconcile me to the Father? Do I see how costly my redemption was? How should I respond? how should I live? what should be important to me? What should define my existence in light of these realities?

Well, again there is no way to adequately express an answer to these questions...... But I do know that this Christian life should be the most radical, most different, most joyful, most loving, most blazing life on the earth. This life should be nothing short of a total upheaval of the former things to love, adore, and know nothing but Christ and Him crucified; everything else is rubbish, trash, worthless compared to the surpassing worth of knowing Christ! I should continually weep or explode with praise the rest of my days because of the great love Christ has for me! I should be a fount overflowing with love to everyone around me speaking of my beloved Jesus all the time to everyone continually. I mean, if I see others on their a way to a lake of fire just as I was... should I not warn them and offer them the same love I have received? How can I keep silent?
Should I not stand before Christ and continually praise Him night and day, day and night? Should I not carry a driving conviction that He must be worshipped? Should I not be devastated when there are places on the earth that don’t know him and love Him? Should I not throw myself into the
most debase places on earth so that Christ would receive the reward of His suffering? This may put my life in danger.... SO BE IT, if I get to die for His name it should be considered the greatest privilege to partake in sharing in the sufferings of Christ. Certainly I should thrust myself completely and totally into these two things: Christ must be worshipped in every place all the time incessantly without ceasing and the lost must hear of this gospel that Jesus would receive His inheritance and so that they would receive the same mercy I have received.

But the reality is that I don’t live that way except for rare moments here and there. So here is where I am greatly humbled.... I am not capable to respond with the love I know Christ deserves. I have no devotion in myself to throw myself into Christ continually. I must have the power of the Holy Spirit to wake me up! I am asleep, I am dull, I am so many other things but responding the way I know I should. And I want to say with gentleness that you are asleep with me. If we were awake, if we did comprehend the simple gospel then where are the tears? Where are the shouts of praise, where are the souls saved? Where are the burning ones? Where are the martyrs? Where is the true witness? Where are the true disciples? Where is the fire from the pulpits? Where is the power of God to convert the most hardened heart? Where is the conviction of sin? Where is the true revival? Beloved I don’t say these things to our shame, for we are perfectly loved in our weakness, but as for me I will not stop crying out until this barren soul responds rightly to the beauty of our Jesus! I will not stop groaning until we see the church respond in a manner worthy of the cross! Jesus help us to not let anyone talk us out of our barrenness but to embrace our true reality and let it bear down upon us so deep that we wont rest until You are rightly adored all over the earth!